Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Who Are The People In Your Neighborhood...

Have you guys heard of this app called Next Door? It's an app that has a running stream of what is going on in your neighborhood. I first heard of it maybe a year ago. You have to jump through a few hoops to get it simply so they can verify you actually live where you say you do, but after that, you are in.

You can find or post about lost pets, or sell things if you need to, and basically keep up with the "news" of the area.

Turns out there are way more paranoid, crazy and nasty people around than I thought.

I know all about internet trolls, but I figured with the vast number of people all over the world using the internet, trolls were inevitable, but they didn't represent large numbers of people. Just the same small, pathetic ones over and over again. 

I am currently rethinking that philosophy.


This is the logo. If you see it, RUN AWAY!

People who live right around the corner somewhere, that I shop with at the grocery store and that I dine with at the local coffee shop, are trolls! And super asshole ones to boot! I could have happily lived my life without knowing any of this.  And the ones that aren't super-sized assholes? Wow, what a paranoid lot. I guess the assholes have gotten them all on edge or something because they are convinced that every car driving down every street is a robber or crack head looking to invade their home. I'm not saying it can't happen, but seriously? Every day someone is sure they just foiled a cat burglar or warded off a home invasion by "checking" the suspicious almost offender. And then a zillion others chime in saying they have seen a similar car/robber lurking around looking creepy and they just knew he was up to no good! And then we are all supposed to call the police every single time to get them patrolling our area more and keeping us safe. Seriously, to read this shit you would think we lived in south central LA or something.

I really liked the idea of keeping up on new restaurants opening or old ones closing but that always, always, always brings out the endless complainers. "They closed because the food was terrible/service was bad...blah blah blah" Or even better they start complaining about the ones not even open yet. "I hope they have better food than the last place" or "They better redecorate or no one will go there." Enough already.

Then there are the animal people. We live near the mountain preserve and yet everyone is always freaking out when they spot a coyote or owls or something. Can't we all just realize they live here and assume they are around all the time? Do we need to have postings every 15 minutes about it? Besides, coyotes don't just stand there so by the time you have posted, they have moved on.

One of the last reasons I have it is for the missing dogs. In case mine ever go missing and so I can keep an eye out for other peoples missing dogs. But I have discovered something very strange. I think the "animal people" of the neighborhood are stealing dogs. I know, sounds crazy, but its the same post every day...."I found this lost/stray dog and I was wondering if anyone could take it in and foster it? He's super sweet and I would but I already have 72 foster dogs!"  How the hell is it that only the dog rescue people ever find all these dogs? I would happily rescue some lost dog and get it back to it's owner, but I have seen probably 2 in the 16 years I have lived here. Where are they finding these "lost" dogs every day? Are they driving around looking for them and wouldn't that then make them the "creepy car people" that the paranoid people think are coming to rob them? 

WTF people? I liked it better when I had no idea how weird they all were. Now I'm thinking I need to dump the app and move somewhere else so I can happily pretend that my neighbors aren't a bunch of lunatics.


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