Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Hi Bob! For the First Presidential Debate

For those of you who are sad and pathetic didn't live through the 80's, you might not know what "Hi Bob" is. You could Google it, or check with Urban Dictionary, or just listen to me. I am going to change your life and it will be great I tell you. I know all the best games...but I digress. Hi Bob is a drinking game played to the old Bob Newhart show. When ever anyone said ....wait for it...."Hi Bob", you had to drink. Easy right? Even for an idiot like Trump a drunk!

So, for the first Presidential debate of this illustrious election season, I propose a drinking game! Just like in Hi Bob, you have to drink when certain things are said. We are going to switch it up a little and add different types of booze you are required to drink, and I do not suggest you drive after playing!


You will need approximately this much alcohol

Let's play "OH SHIT!"  (as in Oh Shit One Of These People Is Going To Be President!)

You must drink your alcoholic beverage of choice every time anyone says "As your President..." (this is guaranteed to get you plastered all on its own and by 1 hour in, you will be thanking me!)

You must toast with champagne whenever anyone mentions "tax returns." (it may be premature but we are toasting the demise of DT that will follow people finding that he doesn't have nearly as much money as he says he does.)

You must take a shot of Jaegermeister whenever anyone mentions "private email server" or Benghazi. (because BARF!)

You must chug a can of warm Budweiser at the first mention of 9/11. (because using a national tragedy for political gain should turn your stomach.)

You must drink a shot of Mezcal tequila every time Trump mentions "the Wall" and if he says "Mexico will pay for it" the last person to finish their shot also has to eat the worm at the bottom of the bottle.

Seriously, there is a worm. I have seen it.

You must drink a shot of vodka each time someone mentions "Putin" "Russia" or "hackers."

You must drink the alcoholic beverage of choice of the person to your right every time Trump talks over the moderator and won't stop when he is supposed to.

You must drink the alcoholic beverage of choice of the person to your left every time Trump calls someone a name.

If Trump wins you must drink all the alcoholic beverages in the house in hopes of getting alcohol poisoning and dropping into a coma so you don't have to live through end of the world.

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