Listen, Im going to warn you ahead of time that this is a really random post, but I cannot get it out of my head, so I HAVE to write it. That means your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to read it. It's going to be odd, but if you are anywhere near my age, there might be some fun memories in here for you.
The other day I woke up and I was in those moments between sleep and totally awake where your whole dream is in front of you. But it seems that my whole dream was just an image. It was real and it was strong. And weird.
It was this...
See, weird. But I could see the damn thing clear as day. Nothing else, like me as a kid riding it or anything. Just this. Which made me wonder...they say your dreams are your minds way of sorting things out, or that they have all these meanings, but I fail to see how this fits with any of that shit. I don't really even know if I had one of these as a kid. I don't remember having one, but I remember them like it was yesterday, so maybe a friend had one? I don't know.
Anyway, decided when I got up that I had to google this damn thing and get a look at one. Try to guess what you have to type in google to find this? No freaking idea since it never worked. I tried "yellow bouncy horse," "rubber ball bouncy horse" "horse with handles on its head that you bounce on," none of it worked. In desperation I hit google images and typed in "toys from the 1970's" and that is where the fun began!
These damn things were everywhere! And they were impossible. Im pretty sure that the person in this picture opened the top flap thing where you could fill it with water and arranged the rings on the posts because it could not be done! They would just waft around in the water annoying the shit out of you until you found something else to do.
And then there's this...
There were also little kids toys that came up...
Why was this a thing? I totally remember dragging it around and the eyes rolling back in its phone-head. I'm pretty sure they don't sell it anymore because the string you drug it by is now considered a choking hazard.
And the Sea Monkeys! Oh my God, who didn't have Sea Monkeys? And what the hell were they? I think they were plankton or krill or something. But remember the excitement when you saw this ridiculous ad with these people/monkey/alien/sea horse/things lounging around and you really thought you were getting something special? Liars. And what the hell is that shit about "THEY CAN EVEN BE 'TRAINED'?" This was obviously before truth in advertising laws were written.
And in the end, there it was. I even recalled the etching on the sides. I remember it being a lot smaller than I thought it was going to be and my legs being too long for it, which is pretty impressive since I'm short. I remember the inflation tube on the front and the impossibility of ever actually bouncing on it like kids in the commercials. I remember constantly falling over and being really disappointed in it.
I just don't remember owning one or why I dreamed about it.
But whatever....it was a really fun way to waste a morning on google!