I took this at sunset, but whatever. You cant tell the difference.
So somewhere in my alcohol deprived Lent festivities I decided that this was going to be THE YEAR. After asking around it became apparent that I would be alone at said service. In stepped my Very Dear Friend! Her husband was to be out of town and she would be happy to go! And with that, everything was set for 6:30 a.m. You would think that knowing it was at 6:30 a.m. would give me pause, but again, Im alcohol deprived, so my decision making process is impaired.
When my alarm goes off Sunday morning at 5:45 a.m. I am no longer impaired. Im stunned. Shocked. Disoriented even. But I am crystal clear.
I have suddenly realized the error of my ways.
Had I not been meeting someone, I am certain I would have turned off the clock and gone back to sleep, chalking this up to "I tried but it was hard" and promising to do some sort of service-thingy later. The night before VDF (very dear friend) had texted me about carpooling to church, but I had declined, uncertain of my ability to be on time. Understand this......church is 1 mile from my house. Her house is directly in between. I declined anyway.
So I jumped out of bed, mostly to keep myself awake, and proceed to go about "getting ready" with light speed. I was moving in a daze, but it was a rapid daze. Within minutes my second mistake came to light. Since I was going to be at church when the sun rose, it was now still dark. And people (namely The Hub's) were sleeping, so I could not turn on the light. I should have laid out my outfit the night before, but alas, that required planning I was not capable of at the time. So I grab the tiny flashlight on my night stand that's there in case of emergencies and proceed to try and gather clothing for this.
Thats when problem #3 comes to light. One that would have been easily remedied by fixing problem #2 (isn't that always how it is?). I have no clean underwear. This has been an ongoing theme in my life for like a month now. I think (but don't remember) that I threw away a bunch, planning to get more. But since I don't remember, I didn't go buy any. Now, if this has never happened to you, just let me tell you, it leads to some interesting choices. The short yellow/white skirt I had chosen was O.U.T. Now I have to rethink everything. In the dark. With a flashlight. So I pick a floor length, double layer skirt. Which leaves me with limited shirt choices. I pick one, try it on and it looks terrible with the new skirt. OR, as far as I can tell it does. The flashlight is very small. So I move on to the only other possible shirt. It's the one that sits in your closet and every time you see it you think...."why is this in here?? it doesn't even fit!!" But whatever, I'm in a hurry.
I get dressed and rush in to the bathroom. There, I curl my hair, moisturize, deodorize, and and apply my make-up. Finally ready, I proceed downstairs.
Only to discover that it is only 6:00 a.m. 15 minutes, start to finish. So, having time to spare, I make a cup of coffee. While doing so I hear my back yard neighbor kids laughing and climbing to the top of the swing set searching for eggs. All my pity goes to their mother for having little kids on a holiday. Sure, it's magical, but it's also torture.
So I text VDF and tell her I can come on by and get her for church. As I back out of my driveway I notice the full moon is still visible and its hung very low right over the mountains. As I am admiring this and thinking there are truly benefits to rising early, I spill my coffee down the front of my shirt. Did I mention it was white? And too small one. And since church is only 11 minutes from starting, there will be no changing. I had exactly 1 mile to go.
I will greet the risen Jesus with coffee stains. Nice.
We arrive in time to get 2 of the last seats and settle in for a lovely service and breakfast. Score! They are serving coffee, pancakes, sausage and egg bakes ( the staple of any morning church activity worth it's salt)
Afterwards I decide to go around the block the long way and stop by our local coffee house. Which is closed. We opt for Dutch Bros. I have never been to Dutch Bros. before. Let me just say this.....if Starbucks is a 40-something year old business man, Dutch Bros is a frat house! We are greeted by 4 twenty-something year old guys in bathing suits and T-shirts wearing bunny ears who have obviously put Red Bull in their espresso. They are waaaaay to peppy for 8 a.m.!
I arrive home at 8:20, certain I will have time to enjoy my coffee and newspaper, but before I even get into the driveway I notice that Thing 1 is up. He is NEVER up before 10 a.m. on a day off school. This is odd.
I had chosen not to do the traditional hiding of the eggs this year. Why? Because last year I drug myself out of bed and hid something like 36 hard boiled eggs all over my yard only to be greeted by a 16-year-old and a 13-year-old who were rolling their eyes and moping through the motions acting like the only reason they were doing this was because I was making them. I figured I would get Pinterest-creative this year. I hid 4 plastic eggs each, color coded, in the house, with money in them! And I hid them well! I was sure they would enjoy this soooo much more. I even left a note from the Easter Bunny explaining the whole thing to them. I wasn't in the house 2 minutes when I was informed that a certain 17-year-old someone was disappointed there were no hard boiled eggs in the grass.
ACTUAL NOTE
After they spent 20 minutes hunting down the 8 eggs, moping their way through the process the entire time, I was informed that "that was pretty fun".
It was now 9 a.m. And just think........I get to do it all again next year.
Thank you Jesus for Mimosa's. I know you love me.
ACTUAL MIMOSA
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